my fight gone [very] bad

So today was fight gone bad. My two year anniversary if you will as this was my first bench mark. We didn't have issued notebooks then but I remember thinking I could remember everything I've done so I remember my score of 197 vividly cause I thought about it often. I also remember the day cause its the day after my friend Denise's birthday and we talked about it at dinner that night....

But today. I've been thinking about it often as it is reasonable to think of this benchmark as my true benchmark and judge my progress on this one wod. But having completed this wod with the poor score of 191 I am over the initial shock of my fail and beginning to rationalize with myself. I had two things going for me...1. I have had a pretty good week at crossfit, pullups felt good, I wasn't last every day and I was just feeling better in general, 2. I enjoyed my outfit today. But several signs pointed to poor performance... 1. Nutrition this week has been poor. Ice cream and pasta have both made appearances and I have not been properly hydrating. 2. I kept either procrastinating or getting bumped from heats so it was maybe a couple hours from having warmed up to actually working out. 3. This is what john thinks is my biggest issue today but I went in to it with a poor attitude. After waiting so long I was over it. I didn't want to do it and kept saying so throughout the wod. I had no drive to pushed through and was the queen of breaktaking all over. It was rough. But it is motivating to get my diet back on track and work on my self talk and positive thinking. I hope my bathroom sink can support my weight cause I am hopping right on up there to tell myself how awesome I am!

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to catch up...

Since last week's fiasco, I have been taking it easy.  I took a rest day the next day, and then Friday just went to open gym to work on pull ups which didn't work out so well for me.  I spent time this weekend with family in Pennsylvania, which meant that diet went out the window as my family is not exactly pro paleo, and no workouts got done. 

Started back on Tuesday, and we had front squats for strength work, and double unders and push ups for the wod.  Back in April, I PRd my front squat at 175, but haven't been able to get back to that since, I have been working off 165, and Tuesday was the first day I was able to finish all of my sets at the proper percentages for 165.  I finished with 5 sets at 150 and was happy with that.  The wod, was tiring, as push ups kill your arms and then you are unable to use them for double unders, but I made it with 7 rounds.

Wednesday, I went in the afternoon and the strength work was clean and jerks.  Somehow I always miss cleans for strength days, always.  My previous max on clean and jerks was 115, my jerk is 130, and the last time my limiting factor was the clean, I need to get some open gym time on that, but am only reminded of that when we work on clean and jerks, or cleans in a wod.  I was able to get 120 up, though it was shaky.  I stopped there as I didn't think form was too great and didn't want to injure myself.  The wod was an every minute on the minute three dumbbell cleans, and three split jerks.  I completed it as RXd.

I was reminded to write by looking at the lovely scabs on my forearms from rubbing against the ropes on the rings.  We worked on weighted dips, of which I was able to do negatives and some banded work.  The wod from yesterday was 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1 heavy KB swings and ring dips.  I used a 44# bell, as my back was tight from clean and jerks, and didn't want to pop my hip out again (RX was 52), and a blue band.  I finished in 8:02. 

Tomorrow is exciting as it is what I consider my 2 year anniversary.(with crossfit)

First Post!

I am approaching my two year anniversary with crossfit...and today I had what felt like my worst workout ever.  And by worst, I mean tears (crocodile ones), hyperventilating, long break taking, and oddly enough an ear that kept popping. 

The workout, though terrible, seemed manageable enough.  Coach Ashley reminded us to think only about the exercise we were on, and not what was left to accomplish... easy enough, no?

Nutts:

10 Handstand Pushups

15 deadlifts (prescribed weight 185, I did 95 due to injury)

25 tall box jumps, I used a shorter one for some of them to keep it moving

50 pull ups (where things started to fall apart...I couldn't manage many consecutive pull ups so went to the band, which made me sad)

100 wall balls (with hip issues I couldn't manage a full squat, so I just did partials)

200 double unders

400 m run with plate.

The pull ups took forever. The wall balls as expected took awhile, but toward the end of not going into a full squat, (my hip has been acting out, due to overzealousness in performing splits in yoga) I felt like I was just cheating. The double unders caused things to get crazy.  I think I am pretty good at them, my cardiovascular endurance is another story.  When I am fresh they come fine, when tired they are few and far between.  I got through them in maybe 10-15 sets...maybe, and then the "run".  I walked, couldn't get comfortable with my plate, thought more and more about how pitiful I was, and then came the waterworks. 

I am thankful Ashley was there to talk to, cause I was a hot mess!  It is amazing how one single workout, can make you feel like you are in the worst shape of your life.  I felt like I would be further along in my two years of crossfitting than I am, but am working on embracing my accomplishments, and working toward my goals.  We talked about giving myself a chance to hit the restart.  I am going to assess where I am now, set some goals for 2010, and do work!  I signed up for crossfit because it is fun, and need not let it stress me out.  My blog will serve as a means to me to chronicle goals  (writing them down is the first step) and progress (the actual work), vent frustrations to prevent tears, and shout my accomplishments from the rooftops!